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Women with UC and Sex

The Difficulties of Having Sex for Women with Ulcerative Colitis

Ulcerative Colitis is a type of inflammatory bowel disease. This chronic condition usually affects the large intestine. Individuals with the condition often develop ulcers within the large intestine and this can have devastating effects both physically and psychologically. The frequent flare ups of the condition can make it difficult for women to enjoy intimacy. However, understanding some of the symptoms that develop and how to deal with the difficulties of having sex for women with Ulcerative Colitis can be a good start to increasing sex drive while living with Ulcerative Colitis.

Symptoms of Ulcerative Colitis and How to Manage Them to Develop a Healthy Sex Life

Below are some of the symptoms that may end up causing problems during sex and suggestions to deal with them as they arise.

Sex and Fatigue

This is one of the most common symptoms of Ulcerative Colitis. While it may not be a constant problem it becomes a serious issue when you have flare ups. If you are experiencing this symptom, chances are that you find yourself feeling tired most of the time. You just want to curl up in bed or on the sofa and watch your favorite television show. At this point you will not even pay attention to any advances that your man tries to make. Unless you act on this issue you could end up losing a less understanding man.


While it is normal to feel fatigued while living with Ulcerative Colitis, try and find out what time of the day or night you feel most energetic. Take advantage of that energy to enjoy sex with your partner. Talking to him about your condition will help him appreciate your situation and that can be a good way to ensure that he fully complies with your needs. Some people feel more energetic in the morning while others may be stronger at noon or night. Picking the ideal time can be key to improving your sex life.

Many times the causes of fatigue are nutritional. The colon absorbs liquid and  processes the B vitamins. Have your doctor run some blood tests.

Essential Oils for Symptoms of Ulcerative Colitis

Essential Oils can help setting the mood, whether used in a diffuser, applied topically or a couple drops on some cotton balls in the bedroom. This is a very great line of essential oils Rocky Mountain Oils.  They have a wide range of oils and blends with instructions on how to best use them for best results.

LOVE Essential Oil Blend-Light smell – Calm the Mind and Body


YLANG YLANG Essential Oil-Strong floral scent-Long used as an aphrodisiac-A sensual and relaxing oil

Clary Sage Essential Oil-Medium strength aroma-Uplift your mood-soothing, relaxing, healing


Blend of Rose Blend-Strong floral sweet aroma-Anxiety Relieving Calming Oil-Often used as an Aphrodisiac

Increase Your Libido

There are essential oils that help to increase the libido:

  1. Rose – Anxiety relieving calming oil. Commonly used as an aphrodisiac.
  2. Jasmine – Apply topically as a sensual massage oil.
  3. Clary Sage – The most soothing, relaxing, and balancing of the essential oils. Great for the skin.Promotes feelings of relaxation.
  4. Ylang Ylang – Widely used as an aphrodisiac. Has a floral scent that is pleasing to most people.

Sex and Diarrhea

This is not only a discomforting symptom but it can also cause quite an embarrassment while you are getting intimate with a new or old partner. During flare ups it is common for people with this condition to lose control of their bowel movement and that can cause leakage or explosive release. It can be even worse when you decide to engage in creative sexual positions.


To deal with this particular situation you may have to visit your local pharmacy and buy  an anti-diarrhea drug. These drugs are often sold over the counter meaning you do not need a prescription from the doctor. Follow instructions of use to ensure they work effectively. Be careful that you don’t overuse them. They can lead to toxic mega colon.

Used before sex will help to mitigate an instance of leakage or an explosive event. Even with this done you should always have clean clothes and bedding nearby just in case of accidents. Again in such situations you may have to talk to your partner about the condition as this may make it possible for you to engage in sexual positions that have lesser risks of making a mess.

Though horribly embarrassing when leakage or an explosive events happen, know that it happens to people without Ulcerative Colitis. Don’t make this a reason for not haven’t a partner to have sex with.

Menstrual  Symptoms

You might get confused because you are never really sure if the symptoms are a result of your normal menstrual cycle or if they are caused by the Ulcerative Colitis. It is quite common to find some women experiencing severe symptoms when they are getting closer to the time menstrual flow. Sex-Specific Issues in Inflammatory Bowel Disease


To deal with this symptom it is a good idea to speak with your doctor about changing the type of contraceptives that you may be using. Some of these drugs may be contributing to the worsening of the Symptoms of Ulcerative Colitis. A change in contraceptives may be key to ensuring that you have better hormonal balance and that the pain you are experiencing is within manageable levels. It is also important for you to get in touch with your doctor and explain how you feel because a solution that is good for one individual may not be the ideal one for your situation.


This is a very good video. She has Chron’s which for the most part has the same symptoms as Ulcerative Colitis:

Pain during sex

There are times when having sex can be an extremely uncomfortable experience. This results from a number of issues that may be leading to painful sensations for you. In such a situation some women end up taking painkillers just so they can have some fun. The truth is that before you establish the real cause of the pain you should not take any painkillers. It is worth pointing out that pain may be occurring due to a tear between the rectum and vagina. Engaging in sex in the face of such a situation can have devastating effects. Check with your gynecologist. If it is not a tear talk to your doctor and allow him to run various tests to establish the exact cause of the pain you are feeling during sex.

If there is a tear the best solution may just be to take some time off. Give your scars enough time to heal before you engage in sex again. Indeed there are situations that are not quite as severe, meaning the doctor can propose some remedies to help you enjoy sex. Some women find that all they need to do is use a lubricant to reduce friction during sex. If you are dealing with wounds and scars opting for oral sex or the use of sex toys may be another way to satisfy yourself or your partner while giving yourself time to heal.



However, if you are going for oral sex, it is not recommended that the woman with Ulcerative Colitis be on the receiving end until it is determined that the UC is not caused by parasites or is infectious Ulcerative Colitis. In some cases UC has been transferred to the sex partner who does not have Ulcerative Colitis.


A lot of women end up having to deal with dehydration when there is a flare up of Ulcerative Colitis. This may happen because of frequent diarrhea or vomiting. As the body loses water it becomes extremely difficult to engage in active sexual encounters which is why you must act on this symptom.

As a general rule of thumb you are encouraged to drink plenty of water even if you do not feel like it. Not only is dehydration going to make you weak it can lead to serious health complications. Clear water is often the best way to keep you hydrated. There are certain liquids that may also be recommended by your personal doctor. Gatorade is also an option if it doesn’t upset your stomach.

Don’t Close Yourself Off

Because of the various problems that surround sex and Ulcerative Colitis a lot of women tend to close themselves off from their partners. This only ends up causing problems in the relationship. While it is a natural response for people to feel ashamed or shy about such conditions the truth is that you do not have to live an unfulfilling life just because of a condition that affects hundreds of millions of people. You will be pleased to learn that there are quite a large number of women who  are dealing with this condition but have boldly faced their partners and let them know about their fears.

If you are not comfortable talking about the condition with your partner it may be advisable for you to get help from a relationship and family therapist. Such a professional knows how to break the ice and bring the two of you to an understanding. Opening up to your partner allows him to get a better understanding of your thought process and emotions. It also gives him the opportunity to help you come up with solutions. It is only by this approach that you will be able to deal with the emotional effects of living with Ulcerative Colitis.


To truly enjoy an intimate sexual relationship you must be relaxed and in the mood. Unfortunately a lot of women living with this condition tend to go through anxiety. This can be a major hindrance to sexual fulfillment. As woman your vagina self-lubricates when you are in the mood for sex which is why you must deal with your anxiety or depression first.



To do this you should make it a point to read up on ways to manage anxiety. Some people engage in fun activities such as swimming while others go for meditation and yoga. Talking to a psychological therapist may be another way to determine dangerous thought patterns and come up with solutions on how to break free of them. As your continue getting help from your therapist you will begin to realize that how you consider your body image and Ulcerative Colitis may play a big role in whether you actually enjoy sex or not.

How to Improve Sex while Living with Ulcerative Colitis

While the above noted solutions can be an effective way of dealing with UC symptoms the truth is that you can go a step further in improving your sex life. There are a number of practical things you can do to spice up your bedroom affairs as detailed below.

Improve Your Self Image

Women sex and Ulcerative Colitis can be a very dicey affair for those who have a low self-esteem. If you are among the people that feels that you are not good enough you are not doing yourself justice. In fact chances are that you are probably dr8iving away your partner or potential suitor because of your self-esteem. By talking to a therapist you will begin to identify some of the things that make you such a wonderful person. You will also identify your weaknesses and come up with solutions to them. The longer you look down upon yourself the harder it becomes for you to let lose and enjoy intimacy.

Talk to Your Partner

One of things that may make it hard for you to engage in intimacy is lack of disclosure to your partner. It is important for you to be completely honest with him and let him know about your condition and what may happen during sex. You do not want him freaking out in the middle of sex as that can cause serious mental frustration for you. It is also true that you will feel relaxed knowing that the person you are about to have sex with is aware of your situation but still wants to go ahead to get intimate.

Prepare mentally

For a person that is living with this condition it may be quite difficult for you to engage in spontaneous sexual encounters. Instead prepare your mind beforehand. This may mean that you have to start focusing on sex a few days or hours before you actually get into it. Do not think about all the bad things that can happen while at it instead focus on the fun side of sex. If you get yourself in the right mindset sex will always be something you look forward to.

Understand your Body

Before you get down to enjoying sex with a partner it is a good idea for you to understand your body better. By playing around with yourself you will get to learn about your most sensual areas. This could be your breasts, thighs, legs, neck or ears. It is actually a good idea for you to use sex toys such as dildos and vibrators to enjoy yourself. As you discover all these things about yourself you will find that you are more relaxed and capable of bringing yourself to orgasm. This will put you in a better position to direct your sex partner in such a way that he will be able to arouse you when you get down to business.

My Secret Luxury sex toy shop has a huge variety of products, instructions and explanations on how to use them.

Set the Mood 

Sex is a vital part of any relationship which is why you must never take it for granted. Setting the mood for this event can be another way for you to ensure that you enjoy it. Buy some scented candles and change the bedding in your room. Put on dim lights and switch on your music system. Wear a sexy outfit and talk to your partner before you get down to it. Naughty texts and suggestive talk are also known to work the magic. Essential Oils can help setting the mood, whether used in a diffuser, applied topically or a couple drops on some cotton balls in the bedroom. This is a very great line of essential oils Rocky Mountain Oils.  They have a wide range of oils and blends with instructions on how to best use them for best results.

Drink some wine

Taking a glass of wine can be a good way to take the edge off. Instead of taking it by yourself invite your partner over and enjoy a glass together. This will allow both of you to loosen up and enjoy the moment.  Sometimes you will be taking medication that will preclude your drinking a little wine. Talk to your doctor and check with your pharmacist. Be careful because alcohol can kill off the good bacteria in the colon. Make sure you take your Probiotics.

This is a good brand. It includes 11 billion gut-friendly bacteria and vitamins through a Pre-B Fermented Whole Food Blend. It does contain soy and tree nuts.







Engage in Foreplay

Engaging in exciting foreplay is another way for you to ensure that your sexual life is fulfilling. As you and your partner touch each other and kiss you will realize that it has a calming effect. This will allow your body to relax and self lubricate while your mind gets stimulated in the right way.

Use lubricants

If you realize that you have too much friction at the start of penetration do not be afraid to pull out that lubricating jelly and apply some. This will make penetration much easier and enjoyable for the both of you.

It is worth pointing out that the more you learn about Ulcerative Colitis the better you will become at managing its physical and psychological effects. Keep reading and talking to your doctor about it. Join Ulcerative Colitis Forums.

Not every forum will be a fit. Find one that suits your needs. I found this to be a good one. Healing Well

By joining forums and talking about the challenges Ulcerative Colitis presents you will come across different people living with the condition and how they are managing their conditions. This information can help you improve on your sex life and the general quality of your life. Though there are difficulties of having sex for women with Ulcerative Colitis these can be overcome and you can have a satisfying sex life.

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